Blame the gods
by LivingforBritishMenTBRT
Summary: Loki ends up on Tony's roof, unconscious and groaning, and decides to cause a little mayhem. No pairings yet, but that may change. Rated T to be safe.


**A/N: Hello lovelies, this is my first fanfiction so go easy on it :) I hope its ok, and hopefully I'll have enough creative juices to write another chapter. All Ideas are welcome and cherished. x**

"Bruuuuce! You can't just, _just lock it away!_" wailed Tony.

"Yes I can, and I will, you can't just drink all your sorrows away Tony." Bruce scowled "Now get off the floor and get something proper to eat, you've been down in the lab all day."

Tony, who was lying on the floor at Bruce's feet, scowled, but dragged himself up and stumbled into the kitchen, he stumbled because he was slightly intoxicated from already having a couple of glasses of scotch.

"Jarvis?" Bruce asked.

"_Yes sir?"_

"Make sure Tony can't get into the drinks cabinet, no wait, _any_ alcoholic beverage that may be inside this building."

"_Of course sir."_

At this Tony poked his head out from the kitchen and pouted "Hey no fair, Jarvis is _my_ baby, and nobody else is allowed to give him orders that could threaten anyone's wellbeing _apart from me!_"

"What? So not having alcohol for tonight will threaten your wellbeing, which may I add probably isn't at all that good anyway the amount of hours you spend drinking."

"_Excuuuuuse_ me! Are you questioning my authority you…"

~~CRASH~~

"What the hell was that?" Tony screeched

"I think something just landed on your roof…" Bruce said slowly, looking up as he did.

"Let's go check it out."

They both hurried to the elevator and jumped in. The elevator stated moving at a mockingly slow speed and classical music began to play.

"Very classy Jarvis, wherever do you get it from?" Tony asked, sarcasm dripping from his voice.

"_I have a very refined taste sir." _

"Ohhhh feeling a bit sassy today are we Jarvis." Tony replied, where _did_ Jarvis learn to backtalk him, it was certainly not in his programing.

The elevator finally pulled to a stop, and the two men step onto the top floor, where they could get access to the roof. They stepped out of the comfortable warmth of the tower through the sliding doors and into the bitter cold of New York. What looked like a sack of dirt had decided it would take up residence on Tony's roof, and was currently groaning. Well, that's how Tony saw it; he didn't really know if it was real or if it was just the alcohol.

"Oh my god…"

"What the hell is that?!" Tony finished Bruce off, obviously it was real, and they both had the same question on their mind.

The sack groaned again, and when both men got closer, they realised that it wasn't a sack, but a man. A badly bruised man, who continued to groan and shake and Tony just couldn't look anymore. It brought back painful memories.

"Ummmm…Tony?" Bruce was staring at the man like he was an alien. "I think this is…is…is Loki!?"

"What…no, can't be, sorry Brucey you're hullencenating, because that can't possibly be…Loki?" Tony stated as he came closer, be the closer he got, the wider his eyes and mouth seemed to grow. He stopped dead as his mind tried to process the impossible. "No, just can't be, fucking hell, what, what happened?" Tony finished weakly as his mind could think of no other possible answer.

"Quick, help me carry him inside, it's freezing out here."

"What? You want me to carry the guy who tried to take over Earth, and may I add _threw me out a window_!"

"Come _on, _Tony, the guy hardly seems like he can move let alone try and rule earth again!"

"Fine, _fine_, don't give me that look Bruce, I'll help carry him in, but this better be added to some "good deeds" list of mine." Tony grumbled as he picked Loki by the legs.

They both managed to carry Loki inside and lay him on the couch, he was limp and seemed to be having trouble breathing.

"So what the hell are we going to do with him now?"

"I don't know Tony, maybe we should call S.H.I.E.L.D.?"

"I don't think we should Brucey, I don't really trust them, and beside before we hand him over I want to know what he was doing on my roof."

Just then they heard a loud thump from the couch and a piteous groan.

"Oh god, I think he's awake." Tony went over to Loki's head and starting to poke it.

"Tony! Don't do that, you'll only make him pissed." Bruce hissed.

Bruce grabbed Tony around the waist and pulled him away from Loki, to try and prevent any further harm. As Bruce was holding Tony back from going anywhere near the villain they didn't notice he had regained consciousness and was slowly sitting up.

"Ah, having fun there Stark? Banner? I do enjoy watching you two fight over…dominance."

"SHIT!" Tony yelled, spinning round and completely off guard. Bruce let go of him and blushed slightly at the suggestive comment.

Both Tony and Bruce started to advance on Loki, but before they get even get close to him, Loki gave them and suggestive wink and with a smirk on his face he vanished.

"Shit shit shit!" Tony muttered under his breath.

"Tony we're going to have to call S.H.I.E.L.D., or Thor at least." Bruce stated seemingly calmly. The tips of his ears with tinted green which was a warning that he was about to 'Hulk out' as Tony called it.

"Ok, ok, let's call Thor, I don't want to get S.H.I.E.L.D. involved yet, I don't completely trust them."

"Ok, let's call Thor, he might be able to catch Loki before he causes significant harm."

"Jarvis, call Thor for me wouldya."

"_Right away sir, dialling now."_

Tony fished his phone out of his pocket just and Thor picked up, and put it on speaker.

"Man of Iron, how are you? Is there a problem, you have never called me on my communication box before."

"Phone, it's called a phone. And yes there is a problem Big guy, you know your psychotic brother Loki, well he just fell from the sky onto my ceiling unconscious and groaning. Long story short, we brought him in, he woke up, told me and Brucey we would make a smokin' hot couple-"

"Hey!"

"-and poofed off to who-knows-where."

"He must have escaped his prison on Asgard, assemble the Avengers, we must find him before he causes his mayhem and mischief!" Thor shouted into the phone, as he was yet to understand that if you talked normally you could still be heard.

"Ok, Big guy, we'll call assemble everyone, you go out and get a head start, you know him best and where he could be hiding."

Tony hung up and turned to Bruce.

"Well looks like we should get everybody up and at it then. You call bird man, I've got Tash and spangles.

"Ok, see you on the field."

"See ya Brucey."

**Please review, it'll encourage me to write more :) Please please please give me ideas x**


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